The definition of a «conspiracy theory» in the Norwegian version of Wikipedia is as follows (when translated with DeepL.com):
A conspiracy theory is a theory or the belief that problematic social conditions or other phenomena are the result of a secret conspiracy in which powerful groups collude in a hidden plot to advance their own interests. According to the common definition, this assumption is not empirically proven or is at odds with established or generally accepted explanations.
Conspiracy narratives explain political, social, and historical events and social conditions as the result of diversionary tactics orchestrated by covert associations of powerful individuals, rather than as the result of open activities, well-known causes, and natural circumstances. These hidden networks are often described as “power elites” that represent of “everything that is wrong with the world”—groups that seek to gain personal advantages, harm others, or keep the truth hidden from the general public.
I wish to point out, from the start, that according to this definition, I am almost what Neil Oliver calls a «card-carrying conspiracy theorist». I must stress the word «almost», because there are, here and there in the definition, words and expressions (highlighted) and even a phrase, that I definitely do not ascribe to.
Firstly: Although I am sure there are secret conspiracies of powerful individuals – and there are certainly publicly known groups of the very rich and/or very powerful people that meet regularly and reach undisclosed decisions (the Bilderberger group, the Mont Pelerin Society, the Trilateral Commission), the aspirations of what some call the 1% and others call the Epstein Class are well known.
Do they have an organised agenda? «Tja….,» as we say in Norwegian, they don’t really need to, do they. They merely want, quite simply, what I want: To rigorously protect their wealth and to add to it. They are, like me, human.
The difference between them and me – the vast difference – is that when an oligarch wants another pin-striped jet plane, he can reduce my wages, and he will be able to convince the powers-that-be to cut wealth tax and consequently to erode the national health service. As for the likes of me, all we can do, if worst comes to worst, is to join the ranks of the homeless.
Secondly: the phrase “Everything that is wrong with the world” is quite simply an insult to the conspiracy theorist’s intelligence. And yes, I take offence against Wikipedia for misrepresenting people like me.
More precisely, we humans – the species that has called the shots for at least 70,000 years in continent after continent – have not been up to the challenge in terms of long-term planning. We exterminated species and habitats without intending to and we have killed each other because we were convinced we had to. More recently, we have invented smartphones, internet and AI that were all in so very many ways blessings, but that also have unintended and largely unforeseen egregious effects on individual and societal development.
So, having removed the offensive expressions from the (translated) Norwegian definition of «conspiracy theory» and trimmed it a little, what is left is this:
A conspiracy theory is the conviction that some problematic social conditions or other phenomena are the result of initiatives undertaken by powerful entities to advance their own interests.
Conspiracy theories tend to be at odds with established or generally accepted explanations.
More often than not, they are not empirically proven, partly because empirical “proof” relies on “systematic”, long-term observation and patient collection of data (which is not always available to the public), in short on painstaking work that no private or public entity is willing to pay for.Conspiracy narratives explain many political, social, and historical events and social conditions as the result of tactics orchestrated by “powerful individuals or organisations, rather than as the result of democratically controlled activities or natural circumstances. Said individuals or organisations are often described as “power elites” that seek to gain personal advantages for themselves and/or their families and/or social group.
Obviously, they wish to keep the nature and purpose of their activities hidden from the general public.
Example: Smoking has long been known to cause lung cancer. Only in 1950 was Richard Doll conclusively able to demonstrate the link, though suspicions had been rife since the late 18-hundreds. The tobacco companies had done their best to hobble research, not because they wanted to cause lung cancer, of course, but because their goals were more important to them than public health. They spent oodles of money to preserve their wealth and add to it. Take a look at the evidence, if you are in doubt: TIRC, or PR company Hill & Knowlton. If you are still in doubt go to the Smithsonian, but don’t tell me the tobacco companies had honourable intentions.
Now they have been defrocked, as it were, as have the climate change denialists. But the defrocking took time – enough time for them to relocate (“diversify”) their moneys, while we, in the mean time, un-moneyed as we are, were ridiculed.
***
What we actually have in common – the 1% and the rest of us – is fear that we are entering financially dangerous territory. There will be inflation, possibly hyperinflation, most probably stagflation… very possibly something very much worse, though we don’t hear much about these fears: God forbid a bank run.
Moreover, the “democratically elected” leaders in the political West, as well as the unelected leaders of the EU are being so bloody pig-headed and irresponsible that absolutely everything is bound to go from bad to infinitely much worse. Everywhere. Unless, of course, the 99% interfere in a meaningful manner.
Even in Norway, we will be cordoned in, as it were, by companies that will impose dramatic price hikes on food and for supplying water, electricity and petrol, and for collecting garbage., Most of the said companies are owned by other companies that are owned by others in turn (banks). I and most of my compatriots are at the bottom of the food chain in this country.
Let us for a moment consider, then, that there are whole countries who are at the bottom of the global food chain. There are people living in those countries too. Let us think about that and shudder.
***
Allow me to backtrack for a moment, to before the issue of the impending financial difficulties appeared on the horizon.
If you had a company with 600 employees in your own country (a), and you and your company were doing just fine until you discovered that by relocating to another country (b), you would pay less tax and far less wages… am I being a conspiracy theorist if I maintain that by relocating you were serving not your country but your wallet?
Greed is a known construct. Even in the Bible, and, or so I’ve been told, no less so in the Quran.
Take the 1054 Schism, for example. Do you really expect me to believe that it was about the “filioque” or the matter of leavened or unleavened bread? I put to you that it was a result of festering power struggles ever since Charlemagne’s reign.
Back in the day, the filthy rich were more honest than they are today. Take the German Peasants’ War, 1524–1525: The rich did not even pretend to care whether their peasants had food on the table, and had no compunction about slaughtering 100,000 of the poorly armed people who dared defy them.
By 1568, with the printing press, the filthy rich had the “media” to consider and soon learnt to tell glossy lies to explain their killing sprees during the following 80 years’ war between the Netherlands and the bigoted Spanish (Habsburg) rulers. It was all for the greater glory of God, of course. The subsequent 30 years’ war (1618 –1648) that killed millions and millions of Europeans was llegedly, again, for the greater glory of God.
I do not for a moment doubt there were many who truly believed that leavened (or unleavened) bread was heresy! I do not doubt that there were deeply religious people who sincerely believed that Huguenots or Catholics or Arians or whatever… were an abomination to the Lord.
But I am absolutely sure that they were told, in no uncertain terms that such was the case! After all, they were like us – merely human. We humans tend to believe what we are told, if we are told often enough or by the “right” people.
Since time immemorial, there have always been persons who called the shots and who were willing to tell the lies that were called for to satisfy their cravings. There are at all times, in all societies, some few individuals who recognise no limits to their own personal exceptionalism. Some have been mere murderers, others have been dictators, yet others have been Popes, Bishops, generals, FBI-directors, presidents, finance ministers….They have told us what to believe and we have believed them.
They have called the shots throughout history and they still do.
What is absolutely certain, however, is that the New Testament, revered above all other texts by the Catholic Church, the Protestant Church in all its varieties and the Greek Orthodox Church does not advocate ruthless killings of millions of people. So we can conclude, looking back to the seventeenth century that the 80 years’ war and the 30 years’ war – both religious wars – were deeply illegitimate.
I put to you that current warmongers are unlikely to be morally superior to the warmongers of the past.


